The Great Satan - Rob Zombie
5 years after his previous album, The Lunar Injection Kool Aid Eclipse Conspiracy, Rob Zombie is back with a new album, The Great Satan, releasing February 27th, 2026. I had the opportunity to listen to this record for the past month, mulling it over and trying to determine whether Rob Zombie fits into my life at the age of 31, and I can honestly say he really doesn’t. My experience with Rob Zombie stems back to his early 90s era, hearing his songs on The Matrix and Twisted Metal soundtracks as well as countless Halloween parties over the years, and I think that’s where his music belongs for me: In the past. The Great Satan does not have memorable tracks like “Dragula”, “Living Dead Girl”, “Superbeast”, “Scum of the Earth”, etc, further making the album less enticing. However, you could argue that Rob Zombie hasn’t written a song with as much staying power as any of those songs in decades now. This album feels like Rob relied on his band to deliver the nuance and intrigue, while Rob just kinda did the same old Rob Zombie thing. The instrumentation feels modern and leans heavier than I would have expected, with the guitar having a nice crunch and the drums driving the songs forward, double bass pummeling often. Meanwhile, Rob sounds like he is stuck in the past and hasn’t evolved much, while his band sounds more contemporary.
One of my biggest gripes with this record and Rob Zombie’s music in the modern age is that the themes, writing, and track titles feel like a 17-year-old edge lord is trapped inside the body of a 61-year-old Rob Zombie. By now, it feels like this is just part of the act and for fans of Horrocore, but I can’t help but cringe when I listen to newer Rob Zombie music. It reminds me of some of the worst edge lord kids I knew in high school that still post illustrated photos on Facebook of two skeletons fucking with the caption “me and who?”, despite them likely having the most mundane sex you have ever seen. It’s all an act for the sake of seeming “not like the other guys” and going against the status quo, but in 2026, the sentiment has run its course. Gone are the days of the typical jocks, goths, hippies, popular kids, etc. Society has evolved enough that we can recognize that people are a blend of these high school stereotypes. The necessity for music that feeds into this idea is hardly needed anymore. Further proving my point, the album still has some head-scratching titles that seem like they were scribbled in the journal of a deranged man. You can enjoy such hits like “Sir Lord Acid Wolfman” and “Black Rat Coffin”, but nothing as crazy as “18th-Century Cannibals, Excitable Morlocks and a One-Way Ticket on the Ghost Train”, “Well, Everybody’s Fucking in a U.F.O”, or “Teenage Nosferatu Pussy”. Looking back on some of his old titles and even the current ones, I question if he just punches a button on a random name generator and goes with whatever it spits out. How else do you get these, or an album named The Electric Warlock Acid Witch Satanic Orgy Celebration Dispenser?
“F.T.W. 84” starts the album on a promising note, with the instrumentation having that modern Metal sound I was talking about earlier. Rob’s vocals are fine here, but you need to consider that you’re on the first track of the album. You will still have countless tracks to listen to with the same inflection and over-processing of Rob’s vocals. “Punks and Demons” is another passable track, sticking to a more straightforward late 80s/90s Metal sound, clocking in at only 2:37. “The Black Scorpion” is probably my favorite track of the album, with it tapping into Punk and Goth Metal. The song moves at breakneck speed, occasionally broken up by some fun synths. Beyond these three tracks, there really isn’t much else to highlight, unfortunately.
The Great Satan is the perfect album for trashy, cheetah-clad, poorly tattooed Gen-X/Millennial moms who dance inappropriately at their kid’s birthday party. Consider it the modern version of Whitesnake/Poison/Mötley Crüe blasting at a strip club in the 80s, just with more grit and an obsession with the macabre. If you’re stuck in the 80s and 90s, this record is for you! If you’re interested in modern Metal/Hard Rock and prefer to leave the past in the past, skip this one. You aren’t missing much.